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I feel like I’ve lost years of my life because of psychiatric medications

This is very difficult to write for me because of how strongly I feel about it as well as the fact that I’ve lost my ability to write without it taking a huge mental effort. I feel like it stems from brain damage - I didn’t develop this inability until I started on antipsychotics. I know I will lose years of my lifespan as I’ve been on psychiatric medication for over a decade now (I am starting to taper off), but I am talking about years of my life I’ve already lived I feel I’ve been barely alive enough to experience. I have been browsing this sub for a short amount of time and I know that posting this here people will understand, for those unfortunate too well. This subreddit has opened my eyes to the reality of how psychiatry is, though it’s different depending on where you live. But to why I’m posting. I’ve been on psychiatric drugs for over a decade now and now I’m an adult who feels like they lost their formative years to such drugs, drugs a better term for it than medication. I was started on antidepressants, specifically SSRIs when I was still in the single digits age wise when my ADHD (a fake diagnosis in my personal opinion) medication didn’t work and the advice at the time was an ADHD medication in combination with an antidepressant. It completely sedated me for years, but my parents refused to take me off it and forced me to take it, if I didn’t there would be consequences. I think they wanted me to be sedated. When it interfered with my school performance though I was forced to take new antidepressant after antidepressant, none ever working and me being gaslighted for being a fuck up in their eyes. Fast forward a few years and after feeling numb and gaslighted for so long I’m hospitalised because of a crisis, and forced onto antipsychotics with a court order. I am still on antipsychotics, but I’m tapering off of them. My formative years I didn’t do anything except isolate because I felt nothing, nothing towards anything or anyone. I didn’t do anything with myself and one day the anhedonia became too much. I was tired of feeling numb. Since I was hospitalised I’ve been put on antipsychotic to antipsychotic, eventually I started to believe everything that was wrong was wrong with me because of the gaslighting of medical professionals and the years of gaslighting by my family. I was convinced I was this fuck up and that I needed to take medication to fix myself, and that I was inherently flawed. And why? This is all because the medications previous. I realise now, the medications did this to me. It’s a cycle of medications giving you symptoms that medical professionals want to put you on new medication to new medication for. I didn’t realise this till now, and now I realise I need to taper off them. Though I’m doing it safely. I’m tired of not feeling alive at all, I’ve spent years of my life feeling nothing, sedated, and unable to make connections with anyone. I’ve not been able to transition into adulthood because I’m stunted in every way an adult shouldn’t be in the eyes of society. I want to thank you all for this realisation. I’m going to try and live life, I don’t feel like I ever have because I’ve been on these drugs since I was a child. The first thing I need to do other than taper off these drugs is get my physical health back in order because my body has deteriorated over the years. I went from being severely underweight to gaining more than half my body weight in the past year after starting on my most recent medication. If you read this thank you, and wish me luck. I wish you all luck too. This is probably not well written, I apologise, and I know I haven’t talked about all I want to, but this is a venting post. I’m looking forward to being part of this community, though I wish we all didn’t have to meet each other this way.

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removelink
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I got banned from psychiatry for posting this

And people wonder why psychiatry and honestly medicine in general is disliked. And when I messaged mods about my ban I was muted.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Psychiatry/comments/n8ahx3/end_nardil_shortage/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

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removelink
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I got banned from r/psychiatry for posting this:

And people wonder why psychiatry and honestly medicine in general is disliked.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Psychiatry/comments/n8ahx3/end_nardil_shortage/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

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removelink
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I got banned from r/psychiatry for posting this

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benjaminikuta
Doctor increased the amount of pills that I get of depakote 🤦🏻‍♂️ 120 pills...

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Doctor increased the amount of pills that I get of depakote 🤦🏻‍♂️ 120 pills...

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removelink
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Successfully beat Psychiatry.

Hey what’s up guys!!

So I joined this forum years ago and cured myself of Bipolar 1 and Schizophrenia, have been doing extremely well for nearly a year now! I cannot remember the last time I took medications it was so long ago. All of the side effects and long term negative impacts are pretty much non-existent, I have been totally clean and feel amazing! I am going to university for Finance and have impressed many people with how quickly I learn complex concepts, I also had an IQ test done and scored 140-160! My personality has become very charismatic, authentic, and honest which is doing me wonders socially. I got bored today and decided to check up on old YouTubers I would watch and even talked with some old friends who were happy to hear from me in such a while. I decided to give this thread a look, out of curiosity sake, and am surprised to see how this went from a forum of 8,000 to ~18,000 members which is impressive. If it were not for this subreddit, I would have never had the courage to fight the psychiatric system and branch off on my own and solve my mental health problems without medication, therapy, and involuntary hospitalizations. Looking back, those were some of the darkest periods in my life, merely thinking of the nightmare drives me to inner peace and joy as I am now very successful. I am well on the path to a financially rewarding career, and want to help bring some people up in life. Ask me anything, I will not be bothered one bit and I promise I will not give up on you. You guys will always be ranked highly in my eyes. Bless you all on your journey. 🤍🦾

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removelink
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Hey what’s up guys!!

So I joined this forum years ago and cured myself of Bipolar 1 and Schizophrenia, have been doing extremely well for nearly a year now! I cannot remember the last time I took medications it was so long ago. All of the side effects and long term negative impacts are pretty much non-existent, I have been totally clean and feel amazing! I am going to university for Finance and have impressed many people with how quickly I learn complex concepts, I also had an IQ test done and scored 140-160! My personality has become very charismatic, authentic, and honest which is doing me wonders socially. I got bored today and decided to check up on old YouTubers I would watch and even talked with some old friends who were happy to hear from me in such a while. I decided to give this thread a look, out of curiosity sake, and am surprised to see how this went from a forum of 8,000 to ~18,000 members which is impressive. If it were not for this subreddit, I would have never had the courage to fight the psychiatric system and branch off on my own and solve my mental health problems without medication, therapy, and involuntary hospitalizations. Looking back, those were some of the darkest periods in my life, merely thinking of the nightmare drives me to inner peace and joy as I am now very successful. I am well on the path to a financially rewarding career, and want to help bring some people up in life. Ask me anything, I will not be bothered one bit and I promise I will not give up on you. You guys will always be ranked highly in my eyes. Bless you all on your journey. 🤍🦾

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benjaminikuta
Just sharing, with yhe fafe blocked out, initial evidence Calgary, Alta mental hospitals are unsafe. The guy in blue was wearing no facemask, and the nurses-administration expect Covid tested people to share hallways with inconclusively tested (maybe virus) laden folk. Theyre just waiting Covid

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removelink
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Just sharing, with yhe fafe blocked out, initial evidence Calgary, Alta mental hospitals are unsafe. The guy in blue was wearing no facemask, and the nurses-administration expect Covid tested people to share hallways with inconclusively tested (maybe virus) laden folk. Theyre just waiting Covid

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